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What is Soma?

By JP

Soma simplistically put refers to our physical body. Now we know what it is, how can we look after our soma?  

There are many different ways we can look after our physical bodies. I think the main ways that come to mind are nutrition and exercise. These are the most basic and simplest things to know and the hardest to do or maintain. We all know we should eat healthy and exercise, which will go a long way to look after our bodies. However, our busy lifestyles, lack of prioritizing, changing weather, getting sick, injuries and the money involved all contribute to the barriers of realistically maintaining a healthy life style regarding our physical bodies. 

Nowadays, with the internet and AI, there is so much information about how we can eat healthy and what that means for different people in their stage of life. The same can be said for exercise too! There’s so much information and how do you know what will work for you and how can you maintain it?

To make things easier, I asked our trusted Chatgpt for the most minimalist routine for maximum benefit and below is the summary it spat out. It won’t be anything new for most people, however I would like to highlight some possible methods.

Movement

I am not sure about your situation but a 30 minute daily walk can seem a bit long. I don’t know many people who have 30minutes to spare in one slot to for a walk. So one idea instead of doing this walk in one shot, another idea would be to break it up. Some options are 15 minutes in the morning and 15minutes in the afternoon or after dinner, or 10minutes after breakfast, lunch and dinner or even doing 20minutes in the morning and 10 minutes at night, some might prefer to do it outside or if weather is a problem, walk at the gym or on a treadmill. In that way, you could watch your favourite TV show whilst walking and that way kill 2 birds with one stone. Another idea people have is to do walking meetings if that is a viable option for you.  

Strength

Regarding this, the research does that for people over 35 years old, who do strength training, regardless if it is body weight or heavier weights, some of the benefits include helping to preserve muscle, boosting metabolism, helping with daily life functioning, burns fat and decreases chances of injury. As I turned 36 this year, I’m actually looking more into this so that when I get older, my body will be stronger and hopefully able to stay independent longer.

Food

This is the hardest one I think by far. The recommended plate of food includes: ½ vegetables, ¼ protein (ie chicken/tofu/eggs) and ¼ whole grains or starch (brown rice, oats, sweet potato). There are just so many barriers and temptations to keep eating healthy. There’s the mental aspect and your relationship with food. When it is an unhealthy relationship hinders many people from maintaining a healthy diet. I think the most important step is to have a positive relationship with food and acknowledging when ‘you are not eating healthily’ to be able to reframe it in a positive way and to get back to eating the healthy foods as soon as you can. It’s also important to remember to encourage yourself in eating health foods. You will have a better chance at maintaining a healthy diet.  

Drink/Hydrate

This is the easiest one for me at least. Make sure you fill up a drink bottle of water. Keep hydrated throughout the day with water. You can enjoy your sugary drinks and alcohol every now and then, although personally I find it easier to drink water in Asian countries because the temptation of cheap drinks in the west makes it easier to enjoy drinking sugary drinks. I recognize for some people this might be difficult for people to reduce their intake of their favourite drink that might be sugary or an alcohol drink. Again, like with food, the relationship with your favourite drink is important in moderation.

Sleep

The recommended amount hours of sleep for an adult is between 7-9 hours a night which I would say for the average person is difficult for many various reasons. Some might be young kids, others might have to work overtime, most people would stay up scrolling social media or watching Netflix/TV or some might have health issues causing them to find it difficult to sleep for that long. It’s important if this is a problem for you to make sure you take the time to address this. Sleep is a superpower in terms of health for our bodies. With a rested body we are more patient, kinder and more optimistic in addition to be more energetic.

Others

Sunlight is an important way for us to look after our bodies. I think Covid really taught me that. Sunlight helps our bodies, our minds and also helps us to sleep better at night! Other ways to help our bodies include to stretch if you can and stand more. I know of a few people investing in a standing table and they boast about how much it has helped them. Other things to consider is for those who are injured or sick to really take the time to recover and your body will thank you for it. Your physical body is important as we only get one in this life. Let’s look after it so we can love God, love others and love ourselves. Let’s honor God with our bodies (1 Corinthians 6:20).

Which one of these is the hardest/easiest for you to maintain a healthy body?   

What’s one thing you can do today to look after your soma?

How we honour God with our soma? What is soma?

Looking after our bodies which are the temple of the Holy Spirit What are some ways we can do this?

Communication

By JP

Communication is something we do every day even without thinking about it. Each day we communicate with ourselves, our family members, our work colleagues, the people we help and the people serving us whether in the supermarket or delivery person.

The way we communicate is so interesting to me. God has created so many different ways for us to communicate. We can communicate verbally, speaking fast or slow or loud or soft. We can use our non-verbal, our body language, we can tell someone is angry or upset just by looking at someone’s face or body positioning. One fascinating thing to me is we cannot NOT communicate. Even if we do not want to communicate, we show it through our body language, it could include: crossing our arms, being silent, avoiding eye contact, turning away, having earphones in, not smiling or looking approachable.

Some of the aspects I have learned about communication include: 

Clarifying and paraphrasing

A lot of times, people say things and it can be interpreted many different ways and so we need to clarify and not assume. Paraphrasing helps both parties to make sure the communication is clear and both parties are talking about the same thing. 

Open attitude and stating facts

This one I learned from the book ‘Non-violent Communication’. A parent can say ‘I see three shirts on the floor’ in a neutral tone instead of saying ‘your room is so messy’ and the teenager receiving this message can react very differently. Likewise, being curious and stating facts can help the communication seem more neutral and easier to receive.

Staying calm and using an appropriate tone

I remember a pastor mentioning people will remember our tone and calmness. When we are able to use the right tone and be calm, it can help avoid many quarrels and misunderstandings. We can use our tone to be a non-anxious presence to bring calmness along with safety and sense of security too.

Timing conversations

This refers to making conversations are done at appropriate times. Trying to do hard conversation at night time when both parties are tired is not ideal or appropriate for the best outcome. I have found that making a time when both parties are rested and ready to listen to each other helps makes communication much smoother especially when both parties are coming in with the intent to listen to each other and to see each other’s points of views. 

Validating feelings

This one is a big one in terms of helping validate people’s experience. I think in the last 5-10 years, it has become very common in terms of trying to teach this but it can still be hard to do all the time. Helping validate people’s feelings helps people feel heard, valued and important. This encourages people to share more as along as it is done respectfully and with a caring attitude. It’s not just a skill so you can get your own way

I think about the way God the father, Jesus the Son and the Holy Spirit communicate with us. He communicates with each of us in his personal way. God is not some distant God who leaves us to guess what he is saying to us (Acts 17:27). He relates to us. I think of when Adam and Eve first sinned, the first two questions God asks in verses (Genesis 2:9,11), ‘Where are you?’ and ‘Who told you that you were naked?’. God knows what we’ve done, but my interpretation of this is God wants to connect with us. In my mind, he is curious and loving in these questions, not accusing them. God lovingly reaches out to Adam and Eve relationally, asking questions. We see the heart God, Adam and Eve messed up and they wanted to hide and avoid God, God is the one who came seeking after them.

In many ways, our mission as Christians is to communicate the love of God, the gospel, the good news of the kingdom to those who haven’t heard or even those who have heard that they might see and experience the heart of God and turn back to him.  

In the bible, God the father, Jesus the Son and the Holy Spirit all communicate in many different ways and with different emotions. Sometimes God was angry with the Israelites and other times he was patiently talking with them. Other times Jesus has compassion (Matthew 15:32) and other times he communicated angrily (Matthew 21:13). The Holy Spirit communicates with people in so many different ways, sometimes it is through prayer and the bible, to Muslims in the Middle East through dreams and visions, to other people through movies and music, to others, God communicates through audible voice or other people and in some cases, the Holy Spirit talks to us directly.

What are the ways you feel easiest to hear God the father, Jesus the Son and the Holy Spirit communicating with you? What are the ways that you feel God the father, Jesus the Son and the Holy Spirit inviting you to commune with him?

Letting Our Light Shine through our Behaviour

By JP

“In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” – Matthew 5:16

When I think about behaviour, I naturally think about actions—what a person is doing. But beyond the visible, behaviour is a window into the unseen: our thoughts, emotions, motivations, and beliefs. In psychology and counselling, we often explore behaviour-6 by asking questions like:

• What is the reason behind this behaviour?
• What need does it fulfil?
• What does this action help someone achieve?

These questions help us move beyond surface-level observations and into deeper understanding. Why do people do what they do? And even more importantly, why do we do what we do?

The Power of Habits and Intentional Living

Lately, I’ve been reflecting on habits—how to cultivate good ones and replace unhealthy ones. Sometimes, I catch myself engaging in behaviours I know are unhelpful or even detrimental. Why do I keep doing them? Are they simply automatic? Or is there a deeper longing behind them?

Recently, I considered doing a social media fast because I realized I was spending far too much time mindlessly scrolling. A friend, however, suggested a different approach: instead of just abstaining, I should reflect—What am I seeking when I reach for my phone?

• Is it boredom?
• A dopamine hit?
• A form of escape?

This simple shift in perspective changed my approach. It wasn’t just about breaking a habit but about understanding its root cause. Often, our behaviours serve as symptoms of something deeper—perhaps unmet emotional needs, stress, or even a misplaced longing for connection.

I realise not all behaviours carry moral significance. Some are simply neutral—like how we fold our clothes or how we arrange books on a shelf. These actions don’t necessarily reveal much about our character. However, other behaviours—such as how we treat others, how we react under pressure, or the choices we make in difficult situations—can reveal what is truly in our hearts.

Jesus made this clear when He said, “Out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks” (Luke 6:45). Our actions, words, and even habits are often an expression of what is happening internally. This is why true transformation isn’t just about behaviour modification—it’s about heart renewal.

Jesus: The Perfect Example of Purposeful Living

When we look at Jesus, we see that His behaviours were never random or impulsive. Everything He did—whether forgiving sins, healing the sick, or challenging the Pharisees—was intentional and reflected the heart of the Father.

• His actions were rooted in love. Even when correcting or rebuking, He did so with compassion.
• He lived in obedience to God’s will. He didn’t act based on emotions or convenience but in alignment with divine purpose**e.
• He remained consistent in His character. Whether in times of celebration or suffering, His behaviour reflected the same grace and truth.

As followers of Christ, we are called to mirror this intentionality. Our actions should not be driven by habit alone but by a deep desire to glorify God in all we do.

Identity First, Behaviour Second

There’s a common belief that behaviour shapes identity. For example, someone who wants to be fit and healthy may start exercising regularly, and over time, their actions reinforce their identity as a disciplined and health-conscious person.

However, from a Christian perspective, transformation begins the other way around—from the inside out. Instead of merely adjusting our behaviour to fit a new identity, we need to allow God to transform our hearts, and from that transformation, our behaviour naturally changes and with long lasting effect showing a deep transformation.

Romans 12:2 reminds us, “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” Our identity in Christ—being children of God, redeemed and made new—should be the foundation from which our actions flow. Rather than striving to behave in a certain way to become more Christian, we let God work within us, and our behaviours begin to reflect His love, grace, and righteousness.

A Challenge to Reflect

Perhaps the challenge for us today is not just to examine what we do but to ask ourselves why we do it.

• Do our behaviours bring us closer to God, or do they distract us?
• Are we living in a way that allows others to see Christ through us?
• Do our habits reflect intentional choices, or are they just mindless routines?

Let us strive to live with purpose, allowing our actions to shine as a testimony of God’s love and grace. May we be intentional in our0 choices, mindful of our habits, and always seeking to glorify God in everything we do.

APPEARANCE: Looks can be deceiving

By Sharon Khoo

But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” – 1 Samuel 16:7

What happens or comes to your mind when you meet someone? You will first notice their outward appearance right? How they appear in terms of their face, hair, physical state, dressing or mood. Whether they look happy, sad, tired or some other emotion.

That’s normal and what we naturally do when we meet anyone.

We check ourselves out in the mirror to make sure we are looking decent and fine before we step out of our home. But sometimes, on certain bad days, we might not even bear to take a look at ourselves, let alone care about our appearance in the mirror.

And when this happens, what do we do? Well, some of us would mask our true appearance. We hide under our made-up hair, fancy make up, a favorite cap, nice clothes or even force on a (fake) smile. Just to tell others or ourselves that we look or feel ok, even when we’re not. There are then some of us who would prefer to stay real, and let the truth about how we’re feeling or doing on the inside come out on our outside – like not caring anymore about what we wear or how we look, and just letting it be laid bare, moody vibes, being bed ridden, no make-up, bad hair day, zits and all (I know I have done this before)!

As the old saying goes, and like this picture and God Himself says in the bible verse above, looks can be deceiving; never judge a book by its cover (or appearance).

In the picture, the outward appearance of the tattooed man is causing the other men & lady to judge him wrongly even though he is actually telling Christ that his heart is His. This reiterates what God already knows and said in 1 Samuel 16:7 – God looks at the heart, not the outward appearance, as man sees.

God looks past our external façade, to what is deeper and behind the surface of our selves – our heart.

Why? Because that’s what matters. To Him and to us. In the 5 Circles, Appearance appears as a sector in the Physical circle. It is like the entrance or doorway into the sectors and circles deeper and below it: Mood, Love (Mind & Heart circles), and Spirit circle.

Whether it is yourself, your client, a family member or stranger, you can sometimes tell how a person’s mood is from their dressing, posture, facial or outward appearance. For example, a disheveled, worn out, unsmiling or tired appearance could indicate a sad, anxious, angry or low mood, where the person’s heart and spirit is definitely affected.

Or, conversely, someone smiling, and wearing colourful clothes could be in a joyful or positive mood.

And then, we can also have the situation with the picture above – someone appearing like a tough gangster or risqué individual on the outside, being earnestly in need of God on the inside of his mind, heart and spirit, where we don’t tangibly see it.

God doesn’t want us to judge anyone by their cover, looks or appearance, because its what’s inside the person that counts.

I’m reminded of a few clients I know, whom God brought my way to teach me about looking past their appearances, and into their heart. One of them was going through gender transitioning from being a female/tomboy to male. Covered in tattoos & piercings, looking very much like a guy almost from head to toe, my heart broke for her, as we built trust over time and she told me her story of what had been going on in her life as a child till her present state, which had ultimately caused her to choose to have her current physical appearance, and gender transitioning. Though she initially intimidated me (like that picture above) because of her outward appearance, I began to see what God saw – her heart and inner state of a precious and broken child in desperate need of safety, acceptance, love, trust, God’s healing and deliverance.

God knows the importance of looking past appearances, into the heart. To truly see, know, understand and love a person. 

His dear Son, our precious Saviour, identified with us all before we were at our worst –

Jesus was described in His appearance, mind, heart and spirit sectors as this, in Isaiah 53: 2-3:

“He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him,
    nothing in his appearance that we should desire him.
He was despised and rejected by mankind,
    a man of suffering, and familiar with pain.
Like one from whom people hide their faces
    he was despised, and we held him in low esteem.”

To me, it’s almost as if God is saying “You would think that as the Almighty God, I should have made my Son like Me – gloriously glamorous, perfect everyday in His outward and inward state. But, the truth is, in your human eyes, my Son was not attractive nor desirable in His appearance. He was familiar with moods of sadness, grief and depression, from all the rejection, pain and suffering he bore from mankind. And in his heart and spirit, Jesus was despised, unloved and made to feel no worth or esteem. Crushed. … So He could be with you and you in Him, whenever you were ever feeling at your worst.”

Have you come across or known someone who has ever felt or been this way before?

… Jesus understands & identifies. Appearance, Mood, Mind, Heart & Spirit. God sees and knows.

And He bore it for us, with us. So that in our worst state possible, we wouldn’t be alone.

I’m grateful that for all our sakes, God never judges us based on our outward appearance, but our heart. And when our heart, mind and spirit is at home with Him, through Christ (like being at home position on the combi-shape), we will find what we need – acceptance, hope, salvation, empathy and understanding… the list goes on.

God wants our hearts, mood-mind and spirit to be at home with Christ. So that we can truly reflect Him in our outward appearance too.  Just like David whom God appointed to be king, we might even have favour with God. Because of our heart’s right posture with God, and the spiritual state of where it is at – not our outward appearance.

When the inside circles are right with God, the outer appearance and countenance of a person will reflect it. Likewise when it is not reflecting it.

Regardless of how we appear (and God still cares for this part of ourselves; He knows it can affect our mood, thoughts, heart and spirit), what’s more important to God is our heart.

Minding our heart, mind and spirit (which make up the ‘inner man’) is a part of our sanctification process. And as we also know, this process is a really long journey. Both for ourselves and anyone we serve and love, like our family members or clients.

So, while we are still on this long road, taking it one gracious step with Him at a time,

my question to you as a fellow brother or sister in Christ, is:

“How’s the appearance or state of your heart looking like today?

What might God be wanting to say to you about looking past your or someone’s outer appearance, and reflecting His heart?”

… God bless you.

And, from a heartfelt place of love and truth, God & I just want you to know, however you think you appear, You already are gorgeous to Him too!

TASK

By JP

If you were seeing a doctor, would you like one with a great attitude but lacks knowledge and not very skillful? Or would you prefer to see a doctor with a terrible attitude but has great knowledge and is very skillful? Of course, ideally it would be great to see a doctor who has a great attitude, skill and knowledge. Even better than that would be to see a doctor that has been transformed by Jesus Christ along with incredible attitude, skills and knowledge. In TASK, T-A-S-K refers to the Transformation, Attitude, Skill and Knowledge.

Sometimes I think that S (skill) and K (knowledge) is something I feel easier to work on. It’s more tangible, measurable and something I have more control over. I can set goals, monitor and see how I have increased my skills and knowledge. I can attend courses, read articles and maybe even find opportunities for me to practice some skills to help increase my knowledge and skills. Better yet I might even have opportunities to teach to solidify and grow my skills and knowledge. There’s always more knowledge to learn and new skills to attain.

• What skills and knowledge are you hoping to increase in 2025?
• What skills and knowledge have you learnt in the last few years?  

With A (attitude) I feel it’s more difficult to see how I have grown in these. My attitude can fluctuate and change in different circumstances along with my energy levels, my emotions and thoughts. Some days my attitude towards people or circumstances are kind, patient and God-centred and other days they are not so kind, not very patient and self-centred. The thing I find about attitude is that it is not as linear or easy to track compared to skills and knowledge. Generally with skills and knowledge, once you learn it, you might need to refresh every now and then, however with attitude, it needs a daily refreshing. How have my attitudes been God-centred or self-centred when I interact with my family, my colleagues, strangers, friends? Were there situations today that I was self-centred in my attitudes? I find that sometimes doing a daily check helps keep my attitude God-centred or at least aware of when I am God-centred and self-centred.

Daily Attitude check

1. How was my attitude towards people today (Including God, self, family, friends, colleagues and strangers)
2. How was my attitude towards today’s circumstances?
3. God, reveal to me if there were any selfish attitudes or attitudes that were not pleasing to you to today that I may confess, and refresh me with your spirit to have a God-centred attitude towards people or situations.

As with T (transformation), it’s similar to attitude in that it’s difficult to track and see where, when and what God has done in our lives unless we check it. By transformation, I am referring to the combination of our openness, surrender to God as well as God’s work in us. Similar to attitude, I find that since transformation is the work of God, our openness and surrender to him, it’s been helpful for me to evaluate my transformation by asking these three questions.

Regarding our transformation, we can do a daily reflection or dialogue with God and ask him these three questions

Daily Transformation reflection

When did I turn away from you (God) today?

Where were you (God) at work today?

When did I turn towards you (God) today?

The Transforming Power of The Cross

By Tsatsa Narantsatsral

The shape of the Cross illustrates the profound response from God to humanity—a response that remains constant, whether the recipient acknowledges it or not and it is the essence of spiritual transformation. Within the Christian Wholeness Framework (CWF), the Cross is central to the Response step. It has a dual placement: under the Square, illustrating our position in Christ, and at the centre of the Circles, representing the ongoing process of transformation in our hearts.

In addition to being a symbol of salvation, the cross represents the transformative journey from self-centeredness to God-centeredness. It invites us to consider: “What difference does Jesus make in my life?” This question lies at the heart of our reflection and practice as believers, shaping how we understand our relationship with God and His work in our lives.

The Cross has both vertical and horizontal dimensions that represent our spiritual position and practice. The vertical dimension illustrates our relationship with God—our standing in Christ as forgiven, redeemed, and reborn children of the Father. This position is unshakable, regardless of how we feel or behave. Through Jesus’ death and resurrection, we have been reconciled to God and placed into His family. Romans 3:23-24 reminds us, “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” On the other hand, the horizontal aspect reflects our life in the world, lived out in relationships and daily actions. It acknowledges that while our position in Christ is secure, our lives may still reflect areas of self-centeredness, pride, and sin. Transformation occurs as we bring these areas to the Cross, receive God’s forgiveness, and realign ourselves to His purposes.

The shape of the Cross invites us to daily apply several truths about our relationship with God. First, His Person reminds us that the Trinity—Father, Son, and Holy Spirit—reveals the fullness of God’s nature and love. Second, His Presence assures us that, by the Spirit, God dwells within us, communing with our spirit and transforming us from within. Third, His Placing of Us highlights that we are forgiven, born again, united with Christ, and indwelt by the Holy Spirit. Fourth, His Purposes for Us reveal that God calls us to intimacy with Him, to love others, to imitate Christ, and to join Him in His mission to the world. Finally, His Provisions for Us remind us that God equips us with unfailing love, forgiveness, freedom, fullness, and strength to fight the good fight.

The Spirit Circle corresponds to the ongoing work of transformation at the Cross. It reflects God’s unchanging response to the human heart, providing truths that remain constant regardless of our circumstances.

Unshakable Position in Christ

Our position in Christ is secure. As 2 Corinthians 5:17 declares, “If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” This truth applies even when we struggle with doubt, fear, or selfishness. Our identity as God’s beloved children remains unchanged.

God’s Presence Within Us

In our position of being born again, we have the abiding presence of the Holy Spirit. Revelation 21:3-4 promises, “God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain.”

Living with Purpose

We are created for intimacy with Christ and called to imitate Him. As John 17:18 says, “As you sent me into the world, I have sent them into the world.” This purpose gives our lives meaning and direction.

Provisions for the Journey

God’s provisions enable us to live transformed lives:

• unFailing Love: God’s love replaces shame and brings intimacy with Him (Psalm 52:8, Romans 5:5).
• Forgiveness: Through the Cross, we are justified and freed from guilt (Romans 5:8-9, John 19:30).
• Freedom: In Christ, we are set free from sin and empowered by the Spirit (John 8:36, Galatians 5:22-23).
• Fullness: We are filled with Christ’s life and joy as we abide in Him (John 15:4, Colossians 2:10).

Fight a Good Fight: We are equipped to face challenges and grow in resilience (Ephesians 6:13, 1 Timothy 1:18).

journey of transformation involves moving from self-centeredness to God-centeredness through daily encounters with the Cross. The Combined shape of the Square and the Cross symbolises this process: as we bring our sin, pain, and brokenness to the foot of the Cross, we experience God’s grace and are restored to healthy, God-centered functioning.

This transformation is ongoing. The Holy Spirit continually illuminates areas of our lives that need to be surrendered to God—pride, self-righteousness, lack of faith. Each time we respond with repentance, we are renewed and realigned with God’s purposes. As 2 Corinthians 3:18 describes, “We are being transformed into His likeness with ever-increasing glory.”

Even in moments of failure, the Cross offers comfort and assurance. We fall no lower than the foot of the Cross, where God’s forgiveness and grace are always available. Romans 8:1-2 reassures us: “There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death.”

Transformation is not merely a theoretical concept; it must be lived out daily. This practice involves surrendering to God, resisting temptation, and embracing His love and forgiveness. It is a journey marked by both challenges and joys, as we grow into Christlikeness and live out our faith in every aspect of life.

To share my own experience, the Cross at the centre of the Circles became the turning point in my journey of healing and transformation. For a long time, I searched for peace externally—in circumstances, relationships, and achievements—only to find myself restless and unfulfilled. True healing began when I experienced the fullness of God’s 5Ps—His Person, Presence, Provision, Placing, and Purpose—in the deepest part of my being. These truths touched every aspect of who I am—my social, physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual self—and began to heal me from the inside out.

This profound experience reshaped how I live out my faith. Each day, I aim to practice using the combined shape of the Cross and Square, sitting at the bottom right corner of the Square, which I now consider my spiritual home. It is here that I bring my weaknesses, self-centeredness, and vulnerabilities before God. As I rest in this place of surrender, I find His grace, love, and strength renewing me. This daily practice fuels my ongoing transformation and sanctification, drawing me closer to Christ and aligning my life with His purposes.

Reflection and Invitation

The shape of the Cross calls us to respond: How is God inviting you to bring areas of self-centeredness to the Cross today? Are there aspects of your life where you need to experience His forgiveness, freedom, or fullness? Take time to reflect on His provisions and promises, and invite the Holy Spirit to illuminate areas of transformation. As you journey with Him, remember: the Cross is not only a place of redemption but also a wellspring of ongoing renewal and grace.

The Shape of the Pyramid

By JP

The shape of the pyramid is about relationships and community. Right at the very beginning in the bible, God said, it is not good for man to be alone (Genesis 2:18). He made us to be in relationship, with himself, with others and ourselves. We need other people. We were designed like this. When we look at the pyramid, we can see the four corners plus God. The pyramid shows us how can we show servant leadership through supporting ourselves, serve and link with others. It’s so important as we serve and lead to

The shape of the pyramid helps me to fulfil the 2^nd commandment, love your neighbour as yourself. The pyramid helps me to look after myself through finding supportive relationships such as: family and friends, local church (through church ministry and church community), to get a mentor (people helper), to be able to find people who can help me professionally when the need arises (e.g. Doctor, plumber, accountant, teacher etc). I’ve been moving countries every 2 years for the last 8 years. It’s always been a priority and a struggle to build and sustain my pyramid. For those who have been in one place for a long time, it might be a lot easier to find those supportive people in your life which I hope you do have them. They are so important for our self-care and wellbeing that we may be able to live long and fulfilling lives.

The role of supportive social relationships in our lives is so important. The research from Harvard University “have been seeking the key to a happy life since 1938, in the longest study into happiness ever conducted. After 85 years of research, they’ve concluded that it is our relationships with other people that give us the greatest happiness.” (Scientists found the key to a healthy, happy life: relationships | World Economic Forum)

It’s not just relationships with other people but it’s about quality of the relationship. The research continued saying “Regardless of their backgrounds, those with the strongest personal relationships were not only the happiest but also enjoyed the best overall health and lived longest.” Scientists found the key to a healthy, happy life: relationships | World Economic Forum

The shape of the pyramid also serves another purpose: serving and linking others together. I remember when I was younger, I was always serving people. This was something that through my family upbringing and my own experiences came naturally to me. However, when serving people, I wasn’t always good or natural at linking. I found the pyramid was profound in helping me to serve people holistically through linking with other people. It helps you not be the only person serving one person. It helps to have a team of people serving one person. It reminds of a how a medical or health team combine their different areas of expertise to help a person. Everyone needs their own pyramid. As we serve others, we can try to help the people we are serving build their own pyramids. It’s really tough when you’re serving a person all by yourself. It can be draining, tiring and lead to burnout. It’s been an incredible experience for me when serving as a team. It’s a lot harder, don’t get me wrong, but the joy and the harvest are multiplied.

Prose on Square

By Jenny Oh

The CWF Shape of the Square, conceptualized by John Warlow, provides a valuable framework for assessing one’s relationship with God. It prompts two critical questions: Am I God-centered or self-centered? Am I flourishing or submerged in suffering? While the model may appear simplistic, it offers a profound means of self-examination, encouraging honesty and awareness in our journey toward spiritual growth and wholeness in Christ.

The purpose of the Square is to facilitate understanding through assessment and reflection, as human beings do not always learn solely from their experiences but rather through thoughtful consideration of them. This is supported by leadership theories suggesting that individuals tend to judge themselves by their intentions and others by their actions. Such a tendency can obscure honest self-assessment, resulting in a skewed understanding of one’s spiritual position.

The Square invites us to listen attentively and still our minds, creating space for God’s voice to speak to us. It enables us to discern whether we are living in alignment with God’s purposes or being driven by self-centered motivations. Even in ministry, one might mistakenly believe they are God-centered simply because they are involved in “God’s work.” However, the Square challenges us to confront this presumption: Are we truly seeking God’s will, or are we merely acting according to our own desires and motivations?

At Oasis Christian Counseling Center, where I serve as Director, the CWF Shapes and Steps are integral to the training of our lay counselors. The first phase of this training focuses on personal application, helping individuals assess their own lives before counseling others. Many of our lay counselor trainees are pastors, Christian NGO leaders, seminarians, and others in Christian leadership. It is imperative that those who guide others first understand their own spiritual longings, patterns, and tendencies. If we live on the left side of the Square—self-centered—we become blind to God’s voice and, over time, may spiral into spiritual indifference. Conversely, for those committed to living a God-centered life, residing on the right side of the Square brings a deeper sense of communion with God, enabling greater clarity about one’s purpose and identity in Christ.

Since my conversion at the age of 18, my overriding desire has been to live according to God’s will. However, there have been seasons in which my ignorance, stubbornness, or fears have led me into self-centered behavior, causing me to slide toward the left side. Yet, my love for God ensures that I do not remain in that state. To those who are in Christ, there is an ongoing transformative process at work, reshaping our thoughts and actions. The Square serves as a mirror, providing us with a structured framework for regular self-examination within the rhythms of our spiritual discipline.

Living in a state of God-centered flourishing is the ideal toward which we strive. As new creations in Christ, we are empowered to live abundant lives. However, even in times of suffering, when we feel overwhelmed, we can rely on the countless promises of God’s presence and care. In Matthew 11:28-30, Jesus invites us to lay our burdens upon Him, promising rest for the weary. While Jesus’ own burden was neither light nor easy, His finished work on the Cross enables us to carry the weight of our struggles through His grace and mercy, rather than through our own anxieties. He is with us; He is Emmanuel.

The concept of God-centered suffering is also significant. The book of Lamentations provides a vivid example of this, expressing profound grief over the destruction of Jerusalem. Yet, even in the midst of such sorrow, there is hope. The inclusion of suffering in the Square reflects the reality that the Christian life is not solely characterized by celebration and victory. In a world marked by injustice, poverty, and war, suffering is an inevitable part of life. However, as Romans 5:3-5 teaches, suffering can also be transformative, producing perseverance, character, and hope, moving us toward Him.

In counseling, the Square provides clients with a useful tool for self-awareness. It offers a simple, universal language through which they can articulate their current circumstances and spiritual state. Thus, the Square is placed within the “Understand” step. When individuals gain a clearer understanding of their identity in Christ and how God views them, they are more likely to experience true wholeness. As counselors and leaders, our role is to guide individuals toward this realization. Through the Square, we help them be in a position to go to God, allowing Him to make meaning of their circumstances. The Square also helps prepare clients for the “Respond” step, whether through the process of Trialogue or other tools.

In one of my couples counseling cases, Darot and Chantha (not their real names) sought help for marriage issues revolving around Darot’s gambling problem. They had been church friends as singles, got married in the church, and still attended the same church as both sides of their families. Chantha found out about Darot’s gambling problem ten years ago but couldn’t tell anyone, including their families. Recently, Chantha decided she could no longer cope with the struggle and sought help. They both loved the Lord and each other, but they allowed this issue to affect their relationship. At first, Darot was very silent, and I could sense from his posture as Chantha discussed his gambling problem that defensive reasoning was likely going through his mind. At some point, I introduced the Square and asked them where they thought they were in it. It wasn’t just Darot, but both of them were able to be honest about their situation, acknowledging that they were acting self-centered and suffering. Through this acknowledgment, the conversation shifted from accusing each other to desiring to hear from God and gain a God-centered understanding. Darot still had hard work ahead of him, in dealing with his gambling addiction, but it no longer took center stage in their relationship. Their primary desire became living a God-centered and flourishing life in Christ. They realized that no matter where they were in the quadrant of the Square, they could always return to the Cross. This was truly good news for them. In conclusion, the Square prompts us toward God-centeredness and reminds us that even when we don’t have complete understanding, it is in being God-centered, whether flourishing or suffering, that we have our being, and ultimately, there’s a confidence all will be well. I am deeply grateful for the opportunity to integrate the CWF Shapes into my ministry and personal life. These concepts have not only enriched my professional work but have also profoundly shaped my spiritual journey. The Square serves as a constant reminder of the importance of remaining God-centered, whether in seasons of flourishing or suffering, and continues to inspire growth and transformation both in my life and in the lives of those I serve.

Through the Lens of the Circles:
“God be the Center for “Who am I?”

By Sally Ladignon

The question of “Who am I?” seems a bit overwhelming to answer especially if there is nothing to anchor on. The 5 circles and its 25 sectors in the Understand Step of the Christian Wholeness Framework (CWF) provided the fitting answer to said question because it captured the Biblical anatomy of man. The circles give a map of “who am I?” as created in God’s image and likeness as shouted out in Psalm 139:23-24 which says,

“Ipraise you, for Iam fearfully and wonderfully made. For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.”

The truth that we are God’s masterpiece cannot be denied, but many might find it hard to believe especially that people are more prejudiced to define “who am I?” based on the triple A of false securities, which are appearance, achievement and authority. All these are temporal with no eternal attachment. The “who am I?” is more than our looks, accomplishments and influences.

I admired people like Drs. John Warlow and Arnold Lazaro who came up with their respective prodigious works on understanding and helping people. Dr. Warlow articulated the beauty and wisdom of the 5 circles with its 25 sectors for deep understanding of “who am I?” with emphasis on God as the center of our being. Likewise, Dr. Lazaro with his multimodal perspective used 7 considerations of assessment to understand and eventually plan for appropriate interventions in an abbreviated acronym of BASIC ID, which stands for Behavior, Affect, Sensation, Imagery, Cognition, Interpersonal factors, and Drug/Biological. These 7 elements (or sectors as called in CWF) represented just 3 circles (social, physical and mind). The 18 more sectors by Dr. Warlow will further draw out the missing puzzle pieces in the “who am I?”

I likened the 5 circles to an earphone when I listen to people’s narratives as they come for help. Their narratives are information-rich containing life themes revealing their conditions sector by sector in each circle. Sectors are like pieces of puzzle, which needed to securely fit to each other to paint a complete picture of “who am I?” promoting better understanding where one might be coming from.

May I introduce a young female adult who I called “Growing Little Girl” or GLG for short who I saw through the lens of the circles. She came for counseling because of a pressing concern. Life was difficult for her while growing up. Most of the time she is below the waterline navigating from left to right or right to left of the square. She is now 30 years old, working and living alone by herself for a long time. During our sessions I reflected back to GLG her narratives circle by circle which she appreciated and felt understood.

Social Circle

GLG and her boyfriend work in the same company as an office staff and a supervisor, respectively. Their relationship lasted for a year and was kept a secret from their co-workers as demanded by the guy until he finally broke up with her. This left her so devasted and heartbroken. She just cannot accept the break-up easily and shamelessly begged him to give their relationship a second chance. Annoyed by her persistence for a reconciliation, he thought of lodging a harassment complaint to local officials to prevent her from getting near him. This pained her more and felt so bad and rejected.

At work, she received a lot of disapproving feedback from supervisors and to compensate for (un)satisfactory performance, she worked extra hours not claiming for overtime pay. She also volunteered for additional work outside of her usual assignments to prove her worth in the company.

At early childhood, her mother left the family and eloped with another man. She and her younger brother were left under the care of their father and his female siblings who also have their own families to tend. Such early abandonment imprinted an empty core in her heart circle damaging the love (self-esteem) and truth (identity) sectors. She lived from one aunt to another when her father died while she was in elementary grade experiencing physical, emotional, verbal and mental abuse.

Physical Circle

By just looking at her appearance no one cannot suspect that she is actually below the waterline. She always put smiles on her face to hide whatever deep hurts are there. She blames herself a lot and harbor guilt feelings when several relationships failed. Because of the break-up she cannot sleep and eat well. Her bothering gastrointestinal issues worsened and needed medical attention from time to time. She also sought psychiatric help for her anxiety concerns. She cried a lot as she remembers how significant people abandoned her without proper closure.

Mind Circle

She lives in fear because of abandonment issues she experienced at home, schools, work and special relationships. Her fear of abandonment makes her anxious for losing someone she cares about. She felt betrayed by people who she thought would be there for her, but at the same time felt guilty for failing them to keep the relationship.

The recent break-up left her so devastated and heartbroken. She felt dead inside, struggled so much mentally and emotionally while wondering where her emotions are coming from which made her cry easily.

Her basic desire is to be helpful by pleasing people which end up abandoning herself of her own needs.

Heart Circle

She realized that people easily gave up on her and leave without reciprocating her need to be loved. She thought she is not enough and lack in many ways for people to appreciate and love her in return. She believed that she is not worth keeping that people will just dump her when they found out she is flawed.

The default message of her childhood that “it’s not okay to have her own needs” led her to repress her own needs and prioritize others’ needs losing her value and identity along the way. She centered more on others missing the triangle of relationship that is founded in God’s love so she can love God with all her heart, soul, mind and strength (Mark 12:30-31)

Spirit Circle

Starting to relate to Jesus as her personal Lord and Savior and not experiencing yet how she can cast her burden upon Him. Oftentimes, she needed to be facilitated to walk her journey and understand the transformation God is doing using her deep pains.

 GLG’s journey will be marked by learning to uproot lies stemming from negative childhood experiences by entrenching God’s truth to live free from past wounds. Although this entails a crucial process, the goals and plans of interventions will be discussed and employ not only the 5 circles, but the entirety of CWF.

I am still a beginner and a trainee in terms of adapting CWF into my counseling practice but through supervision and collaboration with the LW community, GLG will discover and settled of “who she is” in God being her center.

The Power of the Triangle:

Developing God-Centered Relationships

By Karen Grace Paul

The Triangle of Connection creates a powerful bond between God, others, and ourselves. God is at the center of this triangle, connecting us to those we invite into therapeutic relationships. In this sacred space, we invite others to speak to God, express their emotions, and pause to listen in His presence. This simple yet profound approach keeps us present with Him, cultivating peace and connection.

This Triangle of Connection is an useful tool for developing strong, enduring relationships. We begin with God as our Source, allowing His love to flow through us and into others. His love anchors these interactions, forming bonds of hope that can withstand even the most difficult challenges.

This divine connection serves as a strong, three-fold cord, providing the stability and strength required for healing relationships. Within this connection, love flows in two directions: from God through us to others, and in mutual giving and receiving. Drawing on God’s strength keeps all relationships balanced, healthy, and whole. This dynamic relationship, known as the trialogue, entails a transformative conversation in which we invite others to talk to God, finding freedom and rest in His presence. In a trialogue, God plays an active role, allowing us to linger in His presence and seek His guidance. It’s more than just speaking; it’s about making room for God to speak into our lives. Engaging in a trialogue allows us to form deeper connections by sharing our thoughts, fears, and hopes with God and one another while seeking His wisdom. 

This shared experience fosters unity and purpose, as we look to God for guidance and understanding. The impact of these trialogues is enormous. When we linger in God’s presence, and listen for His voice, we gain clarity, peace, and a renewed purpose. This not only changes our lives, but it also affects the lives of those we bring into the conversation. 

Bringing others into a space where God’s voice is central allows them to experience transformation and growth. Regular trialogues strengthen our faith, deepen our relationships, and inspire us to live more intentionally.

Over time, we become more aware of God’s presence and willing to follow His guidance. Time spent with others, inviting them to engage in trialogue with God, creates opportunities for deeper conversations, softens hearts, and brings profound healing.

The Triangle of Connection serves as a conduit for others to encounter God. Trialogues help us and others develop deeper, more meaningful relationships with God, others, and ourselves. I hope we embrace this powerful approach every day, allowing God’s love to guide our interactions and transform our lives one conversation at a time.